Hey guys
First of all: Thank you very much for taking some time trying to help me, I really appreciate that.
I think, Datastore could be at least partially the root of evil. The database hosting host is based on pure SSD storage, with most of the SQL tables being in-memory. I didn't really took the datastore into account, as I read (or better: I think to remember to have read) that the whole networking traffic buffering is done purely in the RAM on ESXi - and my office host (addressing the same SQL db via OpenVPN site-to-site who actually has datastore issues is not showing these timeouts. But thinking more about, It makes sense: As the OpenVPN itself is adding extra latency & limiting factor - in addition to a limiting WAN-connection over country borders, the datastore itself (on the requesting side), cannot make an as huge difference as on the datacenter. I'll further check that, but massive thx already! I think I could absolutely make sure it's the datastore, if I artificially throttle the things down to same levels as with OpenVPN - if the issue is gone: It's clear. If it's really the datastore, then I would be so happy - because it's an easy fix - just get the hosting company to put me a SSD-RAID10 into the host, moving the DB over - thats it Simple, quick, cheap (compared to what an expert checking my VDC would cost).